PrettyThin

The storm. As always, I fight it alone. I cling, soaked and shivering, to the only thing keeping me afloat in these turbulent seas of disarray. My Slenderboat, my willpower. “Eat,” a million echoes seem to call from every direction. “Be normal, normal, normal…” The haunting words are loud enough, but they sound hazy and foreign over the pounding of my own skull. “Thin, thin, thin…” I can’t. I have to, but I can’t. I’m not comprehending anything anymore. The wind is howling, trying to toss me. It must sense I’d be easy to toss. “Thinner, always thinner.” All around me, whirlpools of temptation are churning, laughing, taunting me. They send my boat reeling in some flurry of fog and madness. Shaking fiercely from the cold, I tighten my grip around the scrawny mast of the Slenderboat. “Eat.” Deep-fried waves of control splash across the deck, threatening to knock me off my feeble stance. “Normal.” I cringe and hang my throbbing head. A weak gasp escapes my lungs when the boat makes a ghastly creaking sound. Can’t be much longer until it breaks, the rickety old thing. I need to get to shore, but I’m too numb to think, much less move. The cold. The chanting. Why do I keep listening? “Just one bite won’t hurt you…” Like I haven’t heard that before. It’s the kiss of death! “LIES!” I try to scream back, but who knows if any sound actually came out or not. Breathless, I grit my teeth to ease the pounding. More willpower. I feel dizzy and weak, but I can’t let go. I need more willpower. I can’t fall, can’t let them pull me under. If they do, I know I’ll sink straight to the bottom. Down, down, into the plus-size pits of self loathe. Why can’t they just let me be, right where I am? Where I’m happy? I know that’s a lie, but so is everything else these days. Screw them and their evil temptations. I’d rather be a hungry captain than a full prisoner any day... If only my lifeboat wasn’t also going to be my death.