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Some how I managed to quiet down the voice in my head. Believe me, it could be heard. But I hushed it down to a mumble. After christmas, I weighed 145. The voice yelled. I was ruining myself. I was disgusting. Fat. Repulsive. I decided a diet. Simple, healthy diet. But that wasn't enough. The weight wouldn't come off fast enough. I am fat. I must lose the weight. Today I weigh 134.6 pounds. I grew one inch since last time. I am 5ft 5inches. Pants size 3/ shirt size medium. I am sure this time I will be thinner. Last time I was 95.8lbs 5ft 4in pants size 00. My 16th birthday is on Monday. This will be the fourth year I desired to be thin.This will be the year I get thin. I will not turn 17 fat. My current goal is 127.5 pounds. I give it a week.I am kickin this off with the abc diet and seein where that goes. Tomorrow I will start it. I've been restricting lately. I walked up and down the stairs for about 10mins while watching thinspo videos.
More later...
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2 Comments
You're not fat. That weight, for your height, judging by your mentioned level of exercise, suggests taht the weight is due to your muscle mass, not fat. You're a healthy weight. However, I see nothing wrong with your current goal weight. The issue is your diet plan. It's not good for you. The weight you're going to lose from that kind of diet is your body absorbing your muscles for the nutrients it's not getting from food. It will be loss of muscle mass that makes the numbers go down. My advice is to eat healthy & just restrict your junk food intake. Eat low-fat, but don't eat super low amounts of anything. You'll have a hot body if you take care of yourself. Starving yourself deprives your hair & nails of the proteins & vitamins they're made of. Your hair will fall out, & your nails will start to split & peel away if you starve yourself for a long period of time. Guys don't care so much if you're super skinny. They want a happy, healthy woman. The guys who only care about how much his gf weighs & how "hot" she is compared to a magazine (which is ALL photoshop & make-up), are the jerks who cheat & have no respect for women.
You're so young. You have your whole life ahead of you, & I hope you at least consider what I said. It's never too late to think about what you're getting yourself into. If you insist on doing this, I hope you at least know the things that are going to happen to your body.
You're so young. You have your whole life ahead of you, & I hope you at least consider what I said. It's never too late to think about what you're getting yourself into. If you insist on doing this, I hope you at least know the things that are going to happen to your body.
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